actual 911 call:
911 operator- 911 what is your emergency?
victim- you need to send the cops to Kohls parking lot in atascosita now!
911 operator- mam what is your emergency?
victim- some fat f* is underneath my car sawing off my cat convertor?
911 operator- mam how do you know this husky fellow is stealing your cat convertor?
victim-well I went inside kohls to buy a new duvet parked my car in the parking lot and didnt call a mechanic to service my car while I shopped? Pretty damn obvious send the cops before this fat F* gets away!
911 operator- ok mam we have your location. we have dispatched a unit. Can you give me any other details of the suspect?
victim- hell i dont know? Short fat legs, dumpy fat stupid mofo. Hell you can probably arrest him for all the crack I seen as he crawled from underneath the car.