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Emotional Affairs

Emotional Affairs

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Dutch Active Indicator LED Icon
~ 11 years ago   Apr 1, '12 11:10pm  
Hi SeeV,
 
Great question, I met her at a 12 step program where she was getting off alcohol and I was in Adult Children of Alcololics...yes I know, what was I thinking right! With that said we had a beautiful child and she stayed sober for 10 year + years. Now I know what you're thinking "yep an addictive personally hence the on-line antics."
 
Maybe this is true. But I can tell you through all our marital therapy and all the people who know us. I have been asked at least two dozen times, private issues from people of ALL walks of life,  including church. I get asked "my husband spends X number of hours on-line what should I do?" Or "my wife is communicating with an ex from high school what should I do?" This one is the most popular. "my spouse closes his / her computer or clicks out of the page he /she was on when I come into a room. Is that normal?" The questions seems to always be rhetorical. I can tell you it matters not what background, economic status, education level or how you met, people stray and the Internet makes it a walk in the park. All my ex's emotional affairs started with an innocent dirty little statement or a double entendre from someone
on-line and it was on. Her response to my inquires ranged from "We just catching up." Or the infamous "your being paranoid, were just friends." 
 
Could my ex's background contributed to this behaior...absoluately. Was I into porn with her and we were living a secret lifestyle, no! The reason she gave was simple. I had been very, very, ill and mostly bedridden for years and she claims she was lonely and needed that "kind" of intimate interaction. The reality of it was she neglected me terribly while I was ill and never spent more then a few minutes with me a day. She was so lost in her on-line fantasy world. I just remember her favorite saying "gosh I have so many things to list, I need to get back on-line" after I would say goodnight. Never helped me with a bath, a shower, food, I simply watched her work so hard and NEVER gave it a second thought! She never did make much money, but I excused that for her to. Don't remember why. I guess love is blind, or more accurately co-dependent to the max.
 
Sorry for my rant but I promise the only real answer is to keep a watchful eye out. Yes XJ stating I became "paranoid" was and is correct, but only after I was floored by finding out and it had never stopped...she simply didn't want to stop.  You get a little paranoid living with someone like that.
 
And my final message to you all. If your being accused of being "controlling" by asking questions about your significant others on-line behavior. Pack you bags it's to late. 4951
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SeeVee Active Indicator LED Icon 5
~ 11 years ago   Apr 2, '12 4:23am  
I'm glad my last post didn't offend you cuz I truly wasn't trying to be offensive. You last post was very insightful! 4951
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Dutch Active Indicator LED Icon
~ 11 years ago   Apr 2, '12 10:53am  
No offense taken, as I said great question. I simply wouldn't want any family to be destroyed, when something could so easily be prevented.
 
Thank you for reading my rant, which actually always makes me feel better when I discuss.
 
BTW my heath is great nowadays and I am moving on slowly but surely.
 
Thanks again! 4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 7:56am  
Our souls existed in the heavenly realm/ plane before we entered the earthly plane.Your soul most likely never lived on earth prior. However, it was in other realms.
 
I don't know if you would classify that as reincarnation.
 
But the earthly realm is very special. Many souls don't make it to this realm. Its a test. God is the teacher and the teacher is always silent during the test. The test of love.
4951
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nycoil Active Indicator LED Icon 18
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 8:21am  
more hippy talk.... 4951
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kingwooddiscgolf Active Indicator LED Icon 13
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 8:23am  
Still trying to get that dead cats soul out of my coffee.......... 4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 11:54am  
You asked and I answered.
 
I'm not a hippie. I don't know why people stigmatize spiritual individuals as hippies. Its just wrong.
 
I true spiritual individual does not do drugs nor drink. These are distractions. No eating of meat (animal flesh) because its an unloving act.
 
What people fail to realize is that us being here in the earthly realm is very rare. We are a select special group of souls. Once you come to the realization you have to ask yourself "Why was my soul sent here?".The answer is simple. You're here to learn unconditional love and how to give unconditional love to all of God's creations everyday. If you do not love, then you do not know God because God is love.
 
This is the test. Do you think you will pass it? 4951
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mm4731 Active Indicator LED Icon 13
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:04pm  
[ Removed By Request. ] 4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:08pm  
There will probably be atheists and agnostics that get into the heavenly realm before some Christians because they are more loving to all. 4951
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nycoil Active Indicator LED Icon 18
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:09pm  
There will probably be atheists and agnostics that get into the heavenly realm before some Christians because they are more loving to allnow I know you are of your rocker........what is the source to this tripe?
4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:10pm  
I'm not religious. I'm spiritual.
 
Yes, I read books from all religions but that does not make me religious. 4951
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nycoil Active Indicator LED Icon 18
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:13pm  
yea and that "spirituality" is gonna guarantee you a front row seat with the devil..... 4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:18pm  
Hate will guarantee the front door to hell. 4951
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CantSleepWhenDogsBark Active Indicator LED Icon 3
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:19pm  
God's way is always through love. Love is the way to the heavenly realm. 4951
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nycoil Active Indicator LED Icon 18
~ 11 years ago   Apr 3, '12 12:40pm  
God's way is always through love. Love is the way to the heavenly realm.an yet you insult God's love by following false doctrines......
4951
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