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Potty training

Potty training

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by: IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 12:48pm  
I have struggled with my almost 4 year old for the past year and a half with potty training ! Anyone have any advice of how I can help him ?I have tried reading to him, making up a song ,buyi,g him toysv....I just do t know ... 4951
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donnatella Active Indicator LED Icon 13 Forum Moderator
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 12:53pm  
Bribery works every time.  Boys are slow to train because they just don't want to give it up, so to speak.  We were successful using a favorite candy of his that we called "special candy".  We keep the bag at the top of the linen closet in the bathroom and he only got a piece when he successfully "went" in the potty.  Until he was completely trained, that was the only time he got this type of candy, so we could keep it as the special reward. We only worked with positive reinforcement.  We never scolded when he either didn't make it, missed or whatever, and instead said things similar to, "uh oh...oh, well, you gave tried.  We will keep working on it to help you do better next time." 4951
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Mahm Active Indicator LED Icon 9
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:21pm  
I agree with rewards. My boy responded well to a sticker chart. It looked like a fish bowl. Every time he went #1, he got a small fish. If he went #2, he got a big fish. I also put a floating object in the toilet to help his aim. Something large enough that won't flush. I used the red or orange ring from the ring stack, the ones that look like donuts. Yes I threw it away when we were done with it.
 
When he was resistant to going #2, and would hide to go in his pull-up, I started making him walk around the house in a long t-shirt and no pull-up. That actually worked because he didn't want to poop on the floor. His biggest thing was privacy though. Even at age 2, I had to let him go with the door closed and hope for the best. 4951
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taramay Active Indicator LED Icon 14
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:21pm  
Unless there is more going on...like a fear oof the toilet or some other issue...he should be able to be potty trained by now. That doesn't mean he wants to be! He has the physical and mental ability. Consistency is key. If he is in underwear at home, he needs to be in underwear everywhere. No pull ups. They are no different than a diaper. If he has an accident he cleans it and himself up. He can put his own clothes in the dirty clothes hamper and change into clean ones. Eventually he will understand that he doesn't like doing this multiple times a day.
 
You may want to give him a week or 2 break. Let him relax about it, then go full no diapers without giving in. Don't make it stressful for you or him. Just be very matter of fact.
 
This is what worked for kids I taught who knew HOW to use the restroom...but just didn't seem to quite get it. Good luck!
 
PS....A couple of days spend totally at home with no clothes on at all may be all it takes. 4951
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lilmama09 Active Indicator LED Icon 2
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:30pm  
With my ds, we told him if he wanted to go to preschool then he'd have to learn to go to the potty or else he couldn't go (which was true). He was so excited about going to preschool that he got the potty training down within a month. Maybe if there's something he's excited about and looking forward to, use that perhaps.  4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:49pm  
Bribery works every time.� Boys are slow to train because they just don't want to give it up, so to speak.� We were successful using a favorite candy of his that we called "special candy".� We keep the bag at the top of the linen closet in the bathroom and he only got a piece when he successfully "went" in the potty.� Until he was completely trained, that was the only time he got this type of candy, so we could keep it as the special reward. We only worked with positive reinforcement.� We never scolded when he either didn't make it, missed or whatever, and instead said things similar to, "uh oh...oh, well, you gave tried.� We will keep working on it to help you do better next time."
 
@donnatella:
 
Well I try bribing him with buyi,g him a new dinosaur because that's all he ever wants lol but even then he still does not go unless I put a diaper on him
He has also had accidents and we never get mad at him. he would start crying I guess because it was unconfortable .
He did potty in the toilet 2 Times and then didn't want to go anymore
 
Thanks!!!!!
4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:52pm  
I agree with rewards. My boy responded well to a sticker chart. It looked like a fish bowl. Every time he went #1, he got a small fish. If he went #2, he got a big fish. I also put a floating object in the toilet to help his aim. Something large enough that won't flush. I used the red or orange ring from the ring stack, the ones that look like donuts. Yes I threw it away when we were done with it.
 
When he was resistant to going #2, and would hide to go in his pull-up, I started making him walk around the house in a long t-shirt and no pull-up. That actually worked because he didn't want to poop on the floor. His biggest thing was privacy though. Even at age 2, I had to let him go with the door closed and hope for the best.
 
@Mahm:
 
Thanks. He actually has been going number one for a long time but number 2 is a different story.
I'll try the chart thing maybe it will encourage him to poop he does love stickers also
The dr told me he will eventually go but he holds is til a diaper goes on
 
4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:56pm  
Unless there is more going on...like a fear oof the toilet or some other issue...he should be able to be potty trained by now. That doesn't mean he wants to be! He has the physical and mental ability. Consistency is key. If he is in underwear at home, he needs to be in underwear everywhere. No pull ups. They are no different than a diaper. If he has an accident he cleans it and himself up. He can put his own clothes in the dirty clothes hamper and change into clean ones. Eventually he will understand that he doesn't like doing this multiple times a day.
 
You may want to give him a week or 2 break. Let him relax about it, then go full no diapers without giving in. Don't make it stressful for you or him. Just be very matter of fact.
 
This is what worked for kids I taught who knew HOW to use the restroom...but just didn't seem to quite get it. Good luck!
 
PS....A couple of days spend totally at home with no clothes on at all may be all it takes.
 
@taramay:
 
I think he just does not like to poop sitting down because when he had accidents he is standing
I Think since he pees standing he also wants to poop the same way..
He is a very smart kid and like you say they know what to do they just choose not to
 
4951
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Fallon Active Indicator LED Icon 18
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:57pm  
Removed By Request 4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 1:58pm  
With my ds, we told him if he wanted to go to preschool then he'd have to learn to go to the potty or else he couldn't go (which was true). He was so excited about going to preschool that he got the potty training down within a month. Maybe if there's something he's excited about and looking forward to, use that perhaps. 
 
@lilmama09:
 
Thank you !
Well he does wanna really go see the Jurassic world movie next week so maybe I can use that to help him poop in the potty ! 4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 2:08pm  
Maybe try putting the diaper on him, give it a few minutes and then take him to the potty and let him sit there for a bit.  Not as a punishment, just as a you gotta do this thingEmoticonAnd he simply may not be mature enough to do this yet.  Not all boys are at 4.  If he is ready, he will do it, if not, you are spitting in the wind.  Mine was closer to 5 before he could get this.  My oldest was potty trained at 3.  In like 2 weeks.  Never had an accident.  My youngest son nearly killed me getting him potty trained.  Looking back now, I would have kept at it, just not beaten myself up so bad about him taking so long to do this.
 
@Fallon:
 
Thank you ! Yeah I have heard that but since he is my first this is all new to me
And I wanted him to be potty trained because he might be able to start school this year but if not he will start til 5 Because his school does not have pre I
 
But yeah I do get stressed out because he tells me he has to poop and cries but then just holds it
4951
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taramay Active Indicator LED Icon 14
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 3:01pm  

- - - - - - - -
>> Maybe try putting the diaper on him, give it a few minutes and then take him to the potty and let him sit there for a bit.  Not as a punishment, just as a you gotta do this thingEmoticonAnd he simply may not be mature enough to do this yet.  Not all boys are at 4.  If he is ready, he will do it, if not, you are spitting in the wind.  Mine was closer to 5 before he could get this.  My oldest was potty trained at 3.  In like 2 weeks.  Never had an accident.  My youngest son nearly killed me getting him potty trained.  Looking back now, I would have kept at it, just not beaten myself up so bad about him taking so long to do this.
 

@Fallon:
 
Thank you ! Yeah I have heard that but since he is my first this is all new to me
And I wanted him to be potty trained because he might be able to start school this year but if not he will start til 5 Because his school does not have pre I
 
But yeah I do get stressed out because he tells me he has to poop and cries but then just holds it
 
@IsaiahsMommy:
 
Is he crying because he's scared? If you're having him use the regular toilet...he may not like the feeling of his legs dangling. Try the little potty, or vice versa.
 
If he's scared to the point of holding it, you need to change something. It'll just become a battle of wills. He has all the time in the world to fight you on this. You don't have that luxury!
 
But I do think it would benefit you both to take a break from it if you haven't been getting any results with consistency. The good news is that he won't go off to college wearing a diaper! 4951
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IsaiahsMommy Active Indicator LED Icon  OP 
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 3:51pm  

- - - - - - - -
>>
- - - - - - - -
>> Maybe try putting the diaper on him, give it a few minutes and then take him to the potty and let him sit there for a bit.  Not as a punishment, just as a you gotta do this thingEmoticonAnd he simply may not be mature enough to do this yet.  Not all boys are at 4.  If he is ready, he will do it, if not, you are spitting in the wind.  Mine was closer to 5 before he could get this.  My oldest was potty trained at 3.  In like 2 weeks.  Never had an accident.  My youngest son nearly killed me getting him potty trained.  Looking back now, I would have kept at it, just not beaten myself up so bad about him taking so long to do this.
 

@Fallon:
 
Thank you ! Yeah I have heard that but since he is my first this is all new to me
And I wanted him to be potty trained because he might be able to start school this year but if not he will start til 5 Because his school does not have pre I
 
But yeah I do get stressed out because he tells me he has to poop and cries but then just holds it
 
@IsaiahsMommy:
 
Is he crying because he's scared? If you're having him use the regular toilet...he may not like the feeling of his legs dangling. Try the little potty, or vice versa.
 
If he's scared to the point of holding it, you need to change something. It'll just become a battle of wills. He has all the time in the world to fight you on this. You don't have that luxury!
 
But I do think it would benefit you both to take a break from it if you haven't been getting any results with consistency. The good news is that he won't go off to college wearing a diaper!
 
@taramay:
 
Yeah he has a little potty that he has used but does not like it
And I'm not sure why he is scared I Th I k we have taking it easy on training it been almost 2 years ..
And yeah you are right he knows he has to go and holds it he just says lo,g I can't poop but as soon as that pamper goes on he poops
And lol yeah no doubt about that 😂
4951
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zuesamy Active Indicator LED Icon 2
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 7:29pm  
@isaiahsmommy
 
Does he have any older siblings? My step daughter encouraged her....she wouldnt go poop for mommy or daddy..peeing was never an issue. She hates being wet. But once sissy stepped in it was different for poo. She was 13 then. Maybe a different role model may help. Good luck! 4951
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taramay Active Indicator LED Icon 14
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 7:44pm  
@isaiahsmommy
 
Does he have any older siblings? My step daughter encouraged her....she wouldnt go poop for mommy or daddy..peeing was never an issue. She hates being wet. But once sissy stepped in it was different for poo. She was 13 then. Maybe a different role model may help. Good luck!
 
@zuesamy:
 
That's a really good point. A little girl I used to watch wouldn't poop in the toilet for her parents. I was watching her for the weekend and told her that I don't change poop diapers anymore...so the toilet was her only option. She was perfectly fine with it. Rarely had a problem after that. 4951
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yankeejessica Active Indicator LED Icon 12
~ 8 years ago   Jun 4, '15 7:47pm  
Every kid is different. My oldest I had to bribe with a big toy. Middle son I can't remember and the youngest just up and decided to go one day lol 4951
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