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to the curb...

to the curb...

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by: Francita Active Indicator LED Icon 17 OP 
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 11:56am  
I caught a friend in yet another lie. I just kicked him to the curb. I'm upset. He is a nice person but a habitual liar. I can't tolerate that crap. It really is too bad because he has a huge heart. But this overwhelming flaw. Ugh. 4951
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WJo Active Indicator LED Icon 13
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 12:48pm  
confront him with the lie....it's better to keep a good friend & let them know you know he's lying . Maybe if he knows he's been caught in the lie he will confess & change ..... 4951
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donnatella Active Indicator LED Icon 13 Forum Moderator
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 12:51pm  
@Francita:  Habitual liars do not change and actually start to believe their own bull****.  It hurts...I know I've been there recently...but time heals and you become a better person for walking away.  4951
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mm4731 Active Indicator LED Icon 13
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 12:55pm  
[ Removed By Request. ] 4951
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Ray Active Indicator LED Icon 17
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 1:08pm  
good friends dont lie.They call you for what you are flaws and all.I have numerous acquaintances and only a couple of true friends.I feel fortunate to have made it this far in life and to HAVE a couple of true friends. 4951
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Francita Active Indicator LED Icon 17 OP 
~ 9 years ago   Nov 12, '14 1:28pm  
confront him with the lie....it's better to keep a good friend & let them know you know he's lying . Maybe if he knows he's been caught in the lie he will confess & change .....
 
@WJo:
 
Trust me. I have confronted him. He lied about lies. I have proof of the lie. There was no denying it.... but he did. I even sent him the paperwork I had on it. He denied it. There is no other way to handle this than walk away. I wished him well, told him he needs to seek help as his lies are hurting his relationships, that i care about him and want only the best for him, and then told him to not contact me again. And yes he was just a friend. I cannot and will not be a party to this behavior and in particular, the lie I caught him in. I know my posts may not always reveal it, but I have high standards of integrity and honesty, at work and in my personal world. I won't accept shady. 4951
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WJo Active Indicator LED Icon 13
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 8:27pm  
@Francita...it's a good thing that we can pick & choose our friends , hope he doesn't tell more lies to hurt you now that you have rejected him from your life...good luck to you . 4951
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StartingOver Active Indicator LED Icon 1
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 8:38pm  
I know severL people who are compulsive liars. I limit my interaction with most of them, a few are family and I just have to try to make them keep it honest. Many many years ago I had a problem with lying..... Until I married a compulsive liar. That relationship ended but I learned many valuable lessons... One of which was that I became honest with myself and all others.
 
Some people can change. It is a difficult task to deal with a compulsive liar...but some people can learn and move past it. It is most important to make these people accountable. You see most people either just let them lie and ignore it or walk away from them. 4951
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Odin Active Indicator LED Icon 10
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 8:40pm  
It is a difficult task to deal with a compulsive liar...but some people can learn and move past it. It is most important to make these people accountable. You see most people either just let them lie and ignore it or walk away from them.
 
@StartingOver: I tried to fix one, but I failed.
4951
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StartingOver Active Indicator LED Icon 1
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 8:42pm  
I couldn't fix the one I married.... But our relationship fixed me... 4951
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friday1 Active Indicator LED Icon 9
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 8:50pm  
I'll be your fwind. 4951
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Francita Active Indicator LED Icon 17 OP 
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 9:00pm  
I confronted him when I caught him in lies before. But it was just my recollection of one thing he said then change the story when he told me again. This had happened several times. But he lied about the lies. I knew it was an issue but he is so nice and kind I wrongly blew it off. This time I had recorded court documents about something I'm not willing to share. The documents where dated last week. I specifically asked him about this before and he denied it. The court docs prove otherwise. I only met him when I moved into my new house, he was a neighbor but moved a couple of months after I moved in, we had maintained a friendship, dinner drinks conversation kayaking type of stuff. I feel irritated with myself that my intuition steered me wrong. Normally I have a good feel for people. He was just always so nice and kind to me. I know he had a horrible and I mean horrible childhood. Its one of the only things I know for sure he didn't lie about. The story was the same each time. I looked up habitual liar and his upbringing fits the profile. I think he believes his own lies. I have even given it more thought. I think he needs some serious help in order to live a normal life. It hurts me to know this. I am way too kind hearted sometimes. It's one of the reasons I have to walk away. 4951
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mutton Active Indicator LED Icon 9
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 9:04pm  
How sad for you both! You need to watch out for yourself though... 4951
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Odin Active Indicator LED Icon 10
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 9:13pm  
Yeah, the ones that lie to you even when they know you have evidence that contradicts them are impossible to deal with.  Not sure what mental process they work through.  If they know you know and can prove it, what's the point of continual denials???  Not sure if they do this out of shame or a complete lack of respect for the people they lie to.Tell a lie often enough and it becomes the truth?  No, no it doesn't.  4951
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herron1345 Active Indicator LED Icon 16
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 9:15pm  
@Francita...Look dude...  ....My humble opinion is "good riddance" to that negative drama.......Nothing good can come out of a one way truth based relationship of any sorts......Lies and deceit are pretty common traits of a straight up royal doucher......Doucherness brings about bad energy, and unhealthy vibes........Now, who in their right mind would want to be around a  royal doucher with bad energy.......Point made.......Check mate........Rodger that..... 4951
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BooBear Active Indicator LED Icon 16
~ 9 years ago   Nov 13, '14 9:17pm  
Is omission a lie??? Because if so, I may have a problem... 4951
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