DIVORCE AGREEMENT- - WRITTEN BY YOUNG COLLEGE STUDENT
DIVORCE AGREEMENT- - WRITTEN BY YOUNG COLLEGE STUDENT
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~ 9 years ago
Sep 18, '14 7:04am
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  The person who wrote this is a college (law) student. Perhaps there ishope for us after all.  DIVORCE AGREEMENT  THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A YOUNGPERSON, A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.   Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists,Marxists and Obama supporters, et al: We have stuck together since thelate 1950's for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latestelection process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know wetolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations,but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.   Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree onwhat is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. Wecan smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our ownway.    Here is a our separation agreement:  --Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass eachtaking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sureour two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should berelatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divideother assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.  --We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them.  --You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. --Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, theNRA and the military.  --We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and youcan go with wind, solar and biodiesel.  --You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. You are,however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to moveall three of them.  --We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies,Wal-Mart and Wall Street.  --You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps,homeless, homeboys, hippies, druggies and illegal aliens.  --We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks.  --We'll keep Bill O'Reilly, and Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood .  --You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the rightto invade and hammer places that threaten us.  --You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or ourway of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.  --We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values  --You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctnessand Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N. but we will no longer bepaying the bill.  --We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You cantake every Volt and Leaf you can find.  --You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors.  --We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and "The National Anthem."  --I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute "Imagine", "I'd Like to Teachthe World to Sing", "Kum Ba Ya" or "We Are the World".  --We'll practice trickle-down economics and you can continue to givetrickle up poverty your best shot.  --Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name andour flag.  Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to otherlike-minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree,just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you mightthink about which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.  Sincerely,  John J. Wall  Law Student and an American  P..S. Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin & Charlie Sheen,Barbara Streisand, ( Hanoi ) Jane Fonda with you.  P..S.S. And you won't have to press 1 for English when you call ourcountry. . 4951
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~ 9 years ago
Sep 18, '14 7:41am
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some points are good , but you can tell it is written by a child he was only thinking of the "here & now" not the future .......having 2 to 3 different parties that all have different views & opinions is what makes our country run , maybe not as well as we would like it to run , but we are free to make choices & free to live where we want to live , it's our AMERICA & we will fight to keep the freedom we know & love & not be divided. 4951
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